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"It was a bright and sunny day, the perfect kind of day to lay on a flat rock and bask in the sun."

Percival felt the toughened claw touch his spine just above his tail. Without having to turn around, he knew to whom that voice belonged. It was that old lizardarian gentleman, the Commander, wearing his formal naval officer’s uniform. Percival wondered if the old blowhard had really been in the navy or if he had actually attained that lofty rank, but no one had ever managed to ask. Not many people got a word in edgewise when it came to the Commander.

"It was eighty years ago, in March," the Commander boomed, his voice loud enough for any two lizardians, "I made my way south to Basalt Point, then nothing more than a quaint resort by the sea. Quickly changing into my bathing costume, I made my way out along the rocky cliff to a spot where I could enjoy a good nap in the warm sun. Good for the liver, you know.

"Just as I lay down, a terrible scream roused me. There across the ocean, a giant wave was growing, threatening to destroy everyone on the bluff. Quickly, I raced for the cliff, and dove out and into the water some hundred feet below. I swam to the base of the stationary wave, took a deep breath, then dove.

"Deeper and deeper I swam, until I came to the bottom of the sea. There, as I had expected, was a bed of two-headed tidal weeds. The brother-pods were aligned at the surface, spewing great volumes of water, adding to the wave’s great height. Meanwhile, the sister-pods were holding the wave in place with a mighty vacuum. Grasping the nearest sister weed, I shoved the sister-pod into the face of a brother-pod."

"Tides? Kissing their sisters?" Percival interrupted, seeking vainly to escape the shorter lizard’s grasp above his tail. The short lizardarian’s muzzle hovered uncomfortably close to Percival’s chest, the venerable lizardian's eyes lost under the grey-scaled brow ridges.

"Indeed," the Commander acknowledged, unfazed, "with all the tidal waves thwarted, there was nothing to hold the wave in place. As I surfaced, the rogue wave careened towards the Point. I swam there as fast as I could, stopping only at a tiny island to purchase a large bag and a straw from a small store. Spotting a nearby lemon grove, I quickly filled the bag with the fruits before swimming to the base of the wave.

"Once there, I squeezed the lemons, turning the entire wave into lemonade. With that done, it was a simple matter to drink the entire wave with the straw. But I had forgotten the sugar. The sour lemonade puckered my mouth. As I arrived back on land, I did the only thing I could – I opened a kissing booth, inadvertently starting the Great Fair of Basalt Point, of which you’ve no doubt heard. And that’s how I prevented the tidal waves from destroying Basalt Point."

"Well, Commander, you should know to avoid the tides of March!"

"Quite."

END

Copyright 2010 B. Moon

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